Like: Gen-u-ine Police.

June 11, 2008

This may sound inanely stupid, but I’ve actually rediscovered a sense of respect for police officers.

Many people have grown up with that sense of respect, but a good deal more fall into juvenile sentiment I Illustrated in the post below. It’s the typical suburban thing where they don’t see the actual service that Police provide the community. Kids just see annoying old jerks who are trying stop them from having fun. These kids also don’t see that they’re pretty lame… Of course, I was once one of those kids.

The other thing is we’ve lost what it truly means to be a police officer in the myriad of bullshit cop shows where you have to be psychic, or a genius, or a complete antagonistic retard, or David Caruso. They are all fake identities that has no bearing on real life and give no insight into what it means to be a good police officer. And people look at real gen-u-ine police and see them as not measuring up.

Being a true police officer, is a dignified position if there ever was one. It’s a genuine public service and one that suburban America has completely forgotten about.

Of course, the distractions for police officers are well-documented: the shift of focus from service to stat busting, bullshit drug rips, career-first thinking, racism, etc (and that’s what they are, distractions from doing the job right). The corruption of urban police forces is indeed a reality, but one that is vastly over-represented and over-suspected within the community. A suspicion that often can overshadow and even put limits on the effectiveness of said Police. (quick note, statistically/IA, the best police officers are African-American).

But to all the Gen-u-ine POlice who protect and serve and do their jobs to the best of their abilities, I thank ya kindly.


Don’t Like: The Recent Fox News Speculation on Michelle Obama’s Video of Her Saying “Whitey” When She’s Really Saying “Why’d He…”

June 3, 2008

Fox News is ALREADY pimping out the info about an alleged tape in which Michelle Obama said: “Whitey cut Medicare, Whitey put us in Iraq for no reason, Whitey do nothing about Katrina!”

This is hilarious. A bunch of bloggers, using a simple search for quotes on the internet revealed that this was in fact her talking about Bush and saying: “Why’d he cut Medicare? Why’d he put us in Iraq for no reason? Why’d he do nothing about Katrina?”

Way to go, misunderstanding the way people talk! Yeah, that’s right I used misunderstanding the way people talk as a noun. Deal with it.


Like: Barack Obama (also complicated, but not as much)

June 2, 2008

Okay, here we go. I’m actually going to try and keep this brief.

I voted for Barack Obama in the California primary and I will for him again in the general election (barring anything crazy happening so that he wouldn’t get the nom).

I’ve liked Obama since his emergence on the national scene in 2004. What’s nice is that the public identity he established in those initial moments is still the public identity he has mid-election (which is rare). So many politicians have to mold themselves into the pinnacle of moderacy in the name of elect-ability and sometimes even downplay their strengths (Hillary for example). Instead, Obama has actually been able to create a rallying point around his political identity. What’s even better is that I geniunely believe Obama’s political identity is centered around his real-life personality. Once again, rare.

I’ve written about this at length, but Obama/Clinton supporters can’t really argue about policy between their candidates. There are minor differences (that are important) but they’re so collectively similar on this front that it has become an election of semantics. Because of this, I recognize the fact that many people are drawn to Obama in a largely symbolic syntax. To wit: “Only in America is my story possible”. CHANGE. Yes We Can. A truly new administration and a truly new direction for the country. Instead of 20 years of bush/Clinton/bush/Clinton, we’re moving into the 21st century. The first African-American president. He grew up all over the world. He’s got new ideas on how to handle “the Muslim world”. Yada, Yada, Yada.

This all very wishy-washy stuff. He’s been a senator for 4 years and will have spent 2 of those years campaigning. There isn’t exactly a large breadth of experience he can run on. So basically all he can go on is his identity, image, and promise of change.

The question then becomes, do you trust him and do you think identity is enough? Well, he is a politician and all… that always makes things difficult. But people are buying into him for a reason. He is a fantastic public speaker and historically there is large significance to that. Our most popular presidents have always been great communicators (not a nod to Reagan). There’s also something very powerful about the nature of promise when a progressive leader strikes a chord with a majority. Then you’re entering what I like to call “JFK” territory; the kind of territory where the aura itself actually has an impact. Obama isn’t there yet (not by a long shot) but politically I’m someone who fully recognizes the power of “the promise”.

The worst part of all of this is that it seems to boil down to “I like the guy”… which is awful. Just awful. It’s the kind of thinking that might have given us Bush II. But it all point to a bigger indicator for the national pulse; that there is actually something to the symbolism. The concept of “president as posterboy” is usually used as the butt of a joke, but I actually maintain that it’s strangely powerful. We love the person who stands as the model of decency and goodness. Can the president just be the ultimate role model? It’s just we often disagree on the definition of decency. Bush was endeared to his supporters because of his faith and essence. While I thought he might be the most misguided person on the planet, many of the religious right think he was a terrific president (regular old conservatives? not so much anymore). But there is a reason that the American voter respects The Posterboy… and it’s not because they’re stupid.

It’s because no matter how cynical you get. No matter how corrupt politics is. No matter how much we learn nothing really changes. No matter how much I really wonder if anything needs to change at all. No matter how disappointed I’ve been with the democratic party to the point where I’ve voted Green, yikes… There’s a part of us that wants to believe in someone who can cut through the bullshit, be themselves, be a voice of the people, and turn the country in the right direction.

So I’m going to believe in Obama.

… I’m also going to hold him to it.


Don’t Like: Identity Politics

May 21, 2008

Note: I used two good pictures of the candidates instead of this “use bad picture of the one you don’t like” policy nonsense… I’m looking at you CNN.

Identity politics have always kind of baffled me. Then again, I’m a white guy. I mean, fuck, congress is my identity. But still I always found the idea that you vote for someone because they’re in your demographic as being just plain weird.  Politics is always something that refuses to be simplified and yet that’s always what we want to do.

In the beginning, I was touting the nature of how fame overrides race: Obama was Obama and Hillary was Hillary and their personas are bigger than that kind of simplification. I was wrong… sort of.

The reason identity politics emerged so distinctly are actually pretty simple: Obama and Hillary have virtually identical policies. With no real meaningful debate corresponding to voter issues, the entire race became an argument over semantics. And That is bad. You get into that popularity contest nonsense that usually seems to plague swing voters; only this time everyone’s arguing like that. As the race got more and more competitive,  the candidates started lashing out with attack ads. While people might not have been attracted to their candidates in terms of identity, they CERTAINLY came to defend them in terms of identity. Then things just got worse and worse.

It just sucks that we’ve reached the point where a bunch Obama supporters wouldn’t vote for Hillary and Hillary supporters won’t vote for Obama when their candidates are politically identical.

It’s nonsense.


Like: That Consummate Young Bad-Ass Michael From The Wire was just cast in the new 90210

May 20, 2008

I will never be able to watch the new 90210 coming out and not think of Michael. They could have him dressed up and acting like Carlton from “Fresh Prince” and he’ll still be the little badass from the Wire with one of the most interesting, heartbreaking storylines I’ve ever seen.

But I’m glad he’s going on to do more work, even if he is going to be the token black actor on a show about rich white kids. He is a talented actor and should get more work. I love how the actors from The Wire are finally getting their due elsewhere. Maybe even earning a decent paycheck. Way to go kid.


Like: This Japanese Television Special

May 13, 2008

It kind of reminds me of that King of the Hill episodes where bobby takes the RAD classes and kicks all the school yard bullies in the nads while screaming “I DON’T KNOW YOU! THAT’S MY PURSE!”


GUEST BLOG BY PUDDY: Don’t Like: Genocide

May 12, 2008

The modern world contains many inconveniences and annoyances. Between grand-standing politicians, annoying TV personalities, and rising gas prices, it seems like there’s no shortage of ways in which society can bring me down. That being said, nothing quite sticks in my craw like the deliberate and systematic extermination of a national, racial, political, or cultural group.

For instance, it was recently reported that Steven Spielberg has withdrawn as an artistic adviser to the 2008 Olympics, due to China’s inaction in regards to Darfur. Way to go genocide! Now he’ll probably be replaced with Michael Bay or something, and the Opening Ceremonies will culminate in the torch being lit by an RPG fired by Josh Hartnett.

Unfortunately, genocide is nothing new, and although historians have debated about when exactly the first genocide occurred, it is generally agreed upon that the Armenian Genocide of 1915-1917 was the first genocide of modern times. The genocide began when the Ottoman Empire was defeated by Russian forces in the early days of World War I, and the Ottoman military blamed the loss on Armenians who collaborated with Russian forces. Now right now you’re all probably thinking: “They were collaborating with the enemy. They had to be destroyed. What else could they have done?”. Now normally I’d agree with you, but here’s the thing: THEY WEREN’T REALLY TO BLAME FOR THE OTTOMAN EMPIRE’S LOSSES. THEY WERE JUST BEING SCAPEGOATED BY THE MILITARY TO DEFLECT BLAME FROM THEMSELVES. All of a sudden genocide doesn’t sound like such a good idea, huh? Hundreds of thousands of Armenians were killed just because the Turkish military didn’t want to accept responsibility for their failures. Talk about an overreaction!

Another annoying thing about genocide is that it’s so awful that other atrocities get overlooked. People may suspect that the days before genocide were a simple, peaceful time. However, this simply isn’t the case. Society was replete with all sorts of terrible crimes that struck horror in the heart of men. Things such as stagecoach robbery, pretty girls being tied to railroad tracks, and muttonchopicide (the forcible removal of mutton chops). However, nowadays, you don’t hear as much about these things because the public can only process so much horror before it grows indifferent. But does that make a man being ambushed by a band of Comanches any less tragic?

Now don’t get me wrong, we’ve all had times where we wanted to commit genocide (I’ve wanted to get rid of “Lord of The Rings” fans for years now), but history has shown that it never really works out. Much like suicide, it’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If instead of flipping out and killing everyone, the Turks had sat down with the Armenians and had a frank & open exchange of views, things might have turned out a lot better for everyone. It may be tempting to think that genocide only affects small groups of social undesirables, but history has shown us otherwise. Genocide is something that truly affects us all, by forcing us to wear ugly ribbons and/or wristbands.

Helpful Hint: To find the nearest genocide, go to a local college campus and find a liberal arts major. He/she can give you a long-winded spiel about the nature of the conflict, and make you feel guilty about not donating money to help.

Fun Fact: Everyone knows about the Holocaust, but did you know that there have been plenty of other not-nearly-as-interesting genocides? For example, in Rwanda in the 90’s, tensions between the Hutu majority and Tutsi minority escalated to the point where…oh fuck it, it’s too boring.

Silver lining
: The ending to “Future Legend” off of Diamond Dogs, where David Bowie goes “This ain’t rock n’ roll! THIS IS GENOCIDE!!” is pretty sweet.

Author’s Note: Although Kate Nash has no known ties to genocide, I found the picture irresistibly adorable.


Like: Generic Asian Businessmen

May 9, 2008

Going off stereotypes alone, there’s just a lot to like: their dignity, the karaoke, the love of seafood,  their willingness to absorb new culture and highlight or expose their own, their ethical and high-paying treatment of prostitutes, and even the are they black or deep navy suits? Like I said, just a lot to like.


Like: Genuine Anti-Irish-American Racism

April 28, 2008

I should clarify and say it’s more amusing than something I like.

At it’s best, it’s an outdated reference like the stuff you find in The Simpsons where grandpa will say a tradition started as “mostly an excuse to beat up the Irish”. For good reason you can get away with that over making of fun of other ethnic groups, because no one in their right mind can take that seriously.

But the modern equivalent is also thoroughly hilarious. Growing up “Irish Catholic” in Boston (I’m actually more scottish but whatever), you end up witnessing a lot of Italian American people hate genuinely hate the Irish American people and vice-versa. There for no discernible reason either… at least no good discernible reason. Hell, both sides are the same religion even. The whole thing probably stems from territorial issues and job competition when both groups landed here, but that hardly matters now. Now it’s just meatheads beating each other up in bars. Usually it’s over some monumentally small slight like “accidentally being too close to someone in a crowded bar” or “saying hi to a girl you’re friends with”.

No matter what, it’s just hilarious. Keep taking life too seriously folks!

“Know what’s the most racist city on Earth? Boston. I was in Boston and say two Italian guys beat the crap out of an Irish guy and was like DAMN. These guys are specific.” - Dave Chappelle


Don’t Like: Journalists Freaking Out Over Tyler Hansbrough

April 2, 2008

People who don’t think there’s a racist component in basketball are, well, I’ll just say deluded. Basketball players are overwhelmingly African American, which makes it wholly unlike Baseball (which has a truly multi-cultural makeup) and Football(which features mostly white athletes at the key quarterback position). I won’t even mention Hockey. But due to a number of factors with basketball: the visibility of the athletes, the great tv contract, only 5 starting positions, the popularity in urban areas, and the complete commercial synergy, Basketball is pretty much regarded as a “black sport”. The transition has probably weeded out the actual racist people, but this is not really about that and more about the subtleties of the situation. You see, white basketball players get too much due and a lot of times some black players don’t get enough.

For example, Chris Paul is having the best Point Guard season ever. He runs the pick and roll and high screen better than I’ve ever seen. He can score at will and is the complete core of his team. If he keeps it up (a big if) he could surpass Isiah Thomas as the greatest point guard ever.  And yet he hasn’t got any of the journalistic fellatio that Steven Nash did in his two undeserved MVP seasons. Once again, I love Nash and he’s a terrific player, but come on. He won it in two years where there were clearly better candidates (Tim Duncan could have got his 3rd and 4th) and Nash didn’t get it last year when he actually might have deserved it (that honor went to the also white Dirk Nowitzski). Which brings us to Tyler Hansbrough of North Carolina basketball.

Hansbrough is a damn fine player, again, don’t get me wrong. He has a complete game. He hits clutch shots. He plays with tenacity. His team is great. He’s one of the best players in the country. But he’s not an Oden. He’s not a Durant. He’s a top 5 college basketball player. And journalists are lining up to slobber all over him. He’s being heralded with such vast and uncompromising love you would swear he’s a sure thing on the NBA level. Well no folks, he’s not the sure thing. The reaction is completely out of whack and yes, it’s because he’s white. Completely, totally, wholly because he’s white. There have been a litany of players of comparable value. Just last year Al Horford put up similar numbers (though Hansbrough doesn’t have Horford’s size of physicality). David West too and he even has an eerily similar style of play.  Neither of them got the kind of love that Tyler does.
Why am I so adamant about this? Hansbrough is still a good player right? Because a player should be judged for who and what they are on the court.  America ha broken A LOT of its sports barriers and now it’s time to keep the trend going. It’s okay for most of the great players in the NBA to be black. We don’t have to over-reward the white players who “make it”. It’s okay to compare a black player’s style to that of an historical white player and vice versa. Steve Nash passes in a similar way to Oscar Robertson. There, why is that so hard to say?  People don’t have to be shocked when black players are commended for their intelligence. Black players should be commended for their tenacity and defense, and at the same time there shouldn’t be this complete amazement when a black player “actually tries”. It’s a false perception and it’s kind of BS. It’s all the new epidemic, folks.

… and Tyler Hansbrough isn’t the next Larry Bird.